Dragonheart
by gote
Summary: It's like all the old stories, but the knight and the princess and the dragon aren't sure of the parts they're meant to be playing and, sometimes, they play them all. Actually, it isn't like those stories at all. -LilyScorpius-


**Dragonheart**

Lily was less of a girl and more of a dragon. A wild, uncontrollable mess of energy, with razor sharp claws and a whip of red hair. Her eyes were mud brown and her face dirt smeared. She had five gold hoops in her right ear and a bar through her eyebrow. When she smiled you could see the gap in her teeth and the life in her eyes.

But Lily lay crumbled, shaking on the floor.

The sight would have broken Scorpius's heart, but he was convinced he didn't have one.

He considered just leaving. She hadn't seen him yet. She probably wasn't seeing anything much at all. But he wavered in the doorway for barely a moment before entering the small bedroom.

The walls were dirt-smeared and water damaged. There'd been wallpaper once, floral patterned, but it remained only in small patches, at times peeling over so all that was visible was the yellowed back, curling in at the edges. Old, fading photographs fluttered with disjointed movement on the walls, and drawings dazzled with the intensity of bright and brilliant colours and black lines scribbled so hard that they'd torn through the paper in places were stuck about at random. There was the slightest illusion she'd tried to make the place feel like home, but he knew she felt no attachment to the place, or to anywhere at all maybe.

It wasn't a bed on the floor, it was a mattress. A sheet with small pink roses covered what was probably a collection of harsh springs and questionable stains, but Lily still scurried back to it like it was a place of comfort and safety. Like anywhere was safe. She pulled a worn blanket to cover her barely clad body.

Scorpius attempted to concentrate on anything but the lace or the way her collarbones stuck out just so. There was a cluster of freckles just under there, on her left side, that formed the shape of a star. But he'd seen them before, counted them before.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Lily." The words may have been comforting, but his tone was disdainful.

"Just fuck off, would you? I didn't ask for you." Even through red eyes, tear streaked cheeks and a scowling mouth, she was still threatening. She was still impressive.

He kicked the door shut with the back of his heel. The leather of his shoe was exquisite, the price tag beyond imagining.

"What happened?" he asked, the drawl of his voice barely masked.

"Get out."

"No."

She made a frustrated sound in the back of her throat, like a wounded animal, stubbornly holding onto the conviction that it can get up, that it'll be okay. Pulling her knees up near her face, she seemed to sink into herself. Only her eyes were visible above the blanket. She may have been hiding from him.

He held himself so as not to touch anything in the room. Not the dirty walls nor the rotting door. He didn't join her on that old mattress, didn't run his fingers along the dusty shelves. But he wasn't disgusted, a Malfoy just knew how to hold himself.

Lily sniffed deeply, wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and surveyed Scorpius through slitted eyes. Her voice was surprisingly steady. "You found me."

He gave the smallest nod, like a humble bow. "Again."

"How do you do it?" Her voice is too tired to be venomous. Maybe the dragon's flown away, maybe it lies in hibernation. Maybe it curled up and died.

It was simple really, just a little spell- "You know I'm not going to tell you."

She didn't even bother to argue. He guessed there were only so many times they could have the same conversation, and he should be glad, but -and maybe it was wrong of him- he liked it when she fought back. At least that meant there was some life in her.

"Do you have anything for me?" she asked, her head falling back against the wall behind her.

He remembered the first thing he'd brought her -his heart on a plate. She hadn't been so happy with that either. "You won't like it," he said, and pulled the neatly folded page from his coat pocket. It wasn't at all what she was after from him, but he never liked to appear empty handed. It could be anything that could do it. Only, nothing had worked yet. Not the letters from family, not anything.

She learnt forward to take it from him. The room was so small that although they were on opposite sides they were practically next to each other. Her hands shook slightly as she unfolded it, but with barely a look at the article she scowled and scrunched the paper up.

ILLUSIVE LILY POTTER - SPOTTED IN JAPAN?

There was still something to her in the photos that went along with it. Still meat on her bones, a spring in her step. But they were from Before.

"Where do they get this shit? Japan? I wish."

"This is how I find you," he joked.

A laugh fall from her mouth, like it was completely accidental, and it would have been. "Why are they still so interested in me?" she asked. Her tone was somewhat casual, her blanket fallen just a little. But he knew she hadn't dropped her guard.

"They're not the only ones."

A dark shadow seemed to cross her. "Please don't start about my family again-"

He hadn't been going to. "They miss you, Lily. Every day."

She at least had the grace to look ashamed. "Are you going to tell them where I am?"

"No. You'll be gone by tomorrow."

"I like it here," she said, but that didn't mean it was any less true. "The trees, the animals. There's a cave nearby, I think it might be a dragon's lair."

"You can't run forever," he said, although he was sure that if anyone could, it would be her. Without realising it, he'd learnt back against the door. His arms crossed his chest, his hands twisted into his the material of his coat so he wouldn't reach across and pull her into his arms like he so wanted to.

She looked to the ceiling. He could see the red rim of her eyes. "I just haven't found what I'm looking for yet."

"Dragons?" He didn't mean for his voice to come out like that, a haughty sneer.

She looked back at him. There was nothing kind in her eyes. "Myself, Scorpius."

"You're the biggest fucking cliche," he heard his voice say. "You don't look for yourself, you make it."

"Maybe that's what I'm doing."

He rolled his eyes, glanced down at the doorknob like he considered leaving. And he did. The amount of times that he wanted nothing more than to walk away from her. Walk away from her and never look back.

But he just kept coming back to her. She made it anything but easy, but he chased her down every time.

Lily continued, force in her voice. Behind her brown eyes, the dragon stirred. "I didn't like who I was when I was with them," she said. "The parties, the cameras, the money- it was all a load of bullshit. None of them cared for who I was under that."

"And the jungle? What do all the little monkeys and the banana trees think of the real Lily?" It may have been a little crazy, but he wanted to see the dragon again. He wanted its claws to unfurl and smoke to hiss from its nostrils. He wanted to fight it, wanted to remind it it could fight. To that beast, he would gladly lose.

"Fuck you. You don't know shit."

"Show me. Show me this life, show me this real you. Show me what's worth throwing away everything you have, leaving everyone who cares about you."

She seemed to realise that he had the upper standing - literally - and clambered to her feet. The blanket fell forgotten to the floor. Her nightgown was flimsy and hung loosely on her skinny frame. Once it had hugged her tightly.

He was still taller than her but like this he could feel the force of her. She wasn't big, but she filled the room. Her anger whipped up around her like a cape, raw power seemed to sizzle in the air surrounding her. Like this, you'd think she'd never cried in her life. The dragon stretched its wings. Scorpius waited for its scorching flame.

"I'd show you," she said. "I'd show you everything. But you can't stick around to see it." Her mouth twitched in this sort of smile, the kind with nothing good behind it. "You have-" Her voice was light as spongecake, but there was an edge that let you know her words were rotten. "-a life." Here it hardened once again, like a punch. "Don't pretend for one moment you'd leave it for me."

"I have a job, Lily, a kid."

"I like the order you put those in."

He ignored her. "It's not as easy for me as it was for you."

"Nothing about what I did was easy."

"You never had to do this. Why do you-?"

"Because I'm a difficult personality." Her smile was sickly sweet, mocking.

"You're a stupid, selfish bitch, that's what you are." He regretted the words even as they left him, but he said them anyway. Maybe he just wanted her to hurt like he did. Maybe he wanted her to give up, go home. Maybe he did mean them.

"And you're a little boy who can't grow the fuck up. I'm your little fantasy. A past time you can skip off after whenever you're bored with playing responsible. I want you to stop coming after me, Scorpius. I'm a person, not an ideal."

He shook his head, his voice slippery with disbelief. "You have no idea..."

"About what?" her voice was sharp.

"I care about you. You. Not this stupid little game. You know I'm not into any of this." He waved his hand at just everything around them. "I like comfort. I like security. At least, I always did, before you showed me adventure. And it'd be so insanely disastrous at times, but you'd be so alive and I'd feel it too. But we've grown up now, I like being safe, I like being dry. I like warm fires and hot baths and big meals and king sized beds. But I miss you. And this doesn't feel like you, you're wasting away, and it isn't even about me. I just want to save you. I'd give up the safety and everything else, anything else, if I could help you."

"You're not a hero. There are no heroes."

"There's not perfection, there is heroes. And there's bravery."

Lily's eyes were downcast, her voice quiet. "I wanted to show them I could be brave."

"I know." For the first time since he'd arrived, Scorpius spoke gently. "But sometimes what's brave is not to keep fighting, but to admit defeat. To go home."

And all he'd been wanting was for her to fight. But that just shows what people are. They're a mess of contradictions, a thousand different things that don't line up when you try to pin them down. He was pleading when he spoke to her, he was pleading in his mind. _Please don't mention my family. I'm not a coward and this isn't about running away. _There was a twitch in his face that gave away that he wasn't really so composed.

She was quiet for a long time. "I don't think I know where home is any more."

"It's where the heart is, isn't it? I think that's how it goes."

Something like humour darted around the corner of her mouth, a twitch of the lips, although her eyes were still grave. "And where would my heart be?"

"Right here." He tapped her on the chest. "I almost think I can hear it beating."

Slowly a grin spread across her face. This was better than a roaring dragon. It wasn't a dragon, it was Lily, and she was glorious.

"Well, that solves that problem then," she said. She was smiling in that way that lit up her entire face, the whole room. It couldn't be that simple, it couldn't be over that quickly, but it was a start and that was all that mattered. "I could probably try another."

He smiled so wide he wouldn't recognise himself if he happened to catch a glance at his reflection. "I think you can."


End file.
